Man-Cave n. A dedicated area of one's mind or house, such as a basement, workshop, or garage, where a man can be alone.
Anyone think it is a coincidence that if you switch the words around you get Cave Man?
Inevitably, misunderstandings and miscommunication will occur in a relationship. Perhaps even more so in marriage, due to the closeness of the relationship and the never-ending list of stresses and duties that each party to a marriage faces on a daily basis. These obligations include the very important tasks of being a devoted and present parent, being a supportive spouse, being a dutiful son or daughter and sibling and performing adequately at work. But not to be forgotten are the mundane assignments as well, such as meal preparation, washing dishes, house cleaning, yard work, laundry, paying the bills, and balancing an often non-existent budget.
In my 6+ years of marriage, I have come to be very familiar with my greatest nemesis, the "man-cave". From what I can gather, the man-cave is an apparently peaceful place where a man can retreat to, somewhere in his head (or if lucky a garage or basement) where he blocks everything out, where he thinks and ponders and stews and sometimes pouts, and where no one can intrude. Being in the man cave can include lounging in the Lazy Boy Chair and watching mindless T.V., (perhaps the "History of Ice Cream, Pimp My Ride, or U-571 for the 800th time) or doing random outdoor projects like laying mulch, watering the flowers or "checking the grass growth" at 9:00 at night.
Man particularly likes to retreat to the man-cave following a crisis, or during great periods of anxiety, i.e., during a hurricane evacuation, or perhaps following an emotional breakdown by his wife, or for example, after a large discussion about "emotions and feelings and appreciating his wife more".
Dealing with life, marriage and the man-cave requires a GREAT deal of humor, as I have come to find. Below is a copy of a letter that was sent (mostly in jest but also to make a point) to the man in my house. It was quite successful in setting a time to sit down together and re-connect. And in almost every circumstance, once both people sit down and talk, without any distractions, all miscommunication seems to disappear and peace reigns once more, or at least until the dryer buzzes and the laundry needs to be switched out!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dear Hubby:
Please allow this email to serve as notice that your seasonal pass to the Man-Cave will expire at 5:15 today. Unfortunately, this means that the vacation that your head has been taking up your ass comes to an end. Feel free to take some photos and/or get some souvenirs before you come home from work today!
Please be aware that your wife’s patience will expire tonight, at 9:00 pm, if her husband fails to put down the remote, tune into his life and his marriage and make an obvious effort to communicate with her.
We appreciate your prompt attention to this matter.
Have a good day and best regards,
Management of The 569 Gelpi-Man Cave Time Share, LLC
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
3 comments:
Oh man, that letter was pretty concise.
I usually get flushed out of my cave with yelling, crying, and/or projectiles aimed in my general direction. Admittedly, using just one of the above tactics no longer works on me. It now requires at least two.
For what it's worth, you have inspired me to get caught up on quicken tonight.
OMG...this made me laugh so much! Mark's man cave is the damn bathroon. Why is that when I have to go I am in and out in like 2 seconds or better yet, I hold it in for a more convenient time in dealing with kids. I may have an illness because if this so who knows. But he takes in like magazines, books, newspapers whatever and takes forever. I told him the next time he does that at least take in a book relating to parenting...at least his time will be well spent..ha!ha!
On another note, we need to get the kids together soon!
Viv
It's because they're not as smart as we are, and they require a set-aside time for cogitation. We, OTOH, can form opinions on the presidential election, the economy, popular culture, fall boot heel heights and career plans all while cleaning up someone else's biological fluids.
Post a Comment